Vivian Marie Ostler

November 3, 1935 - December 3, 2020

Vivian Marie (Stupeck) Ostler was born on November 3, 1935 in Michigan City, Indiana, to Ida Leona Scott and Earl Joseph Stupeck. She was born at home, in the house her father built by converting an old Chinese laundry located near her grandparents’ house. The doctor charged $25 for his services; he was assisted in the delivery by the proud papa. Sometime in her first few days, Vivian stopped breathing, and her Grandma Bessie Scott got her started again. As a baby, Vivian was remarkably self-sufficient. She didn’t suck her thumb, use a pacifier, nor have a comfort blanket. She never had a bottle. When she was two years old, her brother Donnie was born in the same house. She remembered they grew up feeling close to each other. At times when her brother was crying, she would put her arms around him to comfort him, and he would do the same for her. In 1946, when Vivian was 10 years old, the family moved to Riverside, California, to start a new life far from extended family. Vivian learned later that her parents were trying give their own marital relationship a fresh start. Her dad soon took on several jobs to support the family, and her mother also took a job. Before too long, however, their problems resurfaced. When Vivian was 11 years old, her parents separated, and her dad quit his five jobs and took her and Donnie by train back to Michigan City, Indiana, to live with their Grandpa Stupeck, Aunt Lucille, and Uncle Bud. He took a job there, and after about six months, he began feeling better, so he returned to California alone to prepare a place to bring his children to live. They set up housekeeping in a 21’ foot trailer in Huntington Park, California, and at the age of 12, Vivian became the lady of the house. Her job was to cook, clean, iron, and help with laundry and grocery shopping. She was also an excellent student, won many awards, and was active in student government. The following summer Reda Bingham moved with her mother into the trailer park. Reda was also ready start 8th grade, and she and Vivian instantly became inseparable friends. Reda had recently been baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and she was convinced that her church was “the only true church on the face of the earth.” She was open and earnest and not afraid to share her testimony. Vivian was soon attending church with Reda, and her own testimony of the gospel was growing. Then her dad decided to move their trailer to Culver City, which meant Vivian would attend a different high school and attend church in a different chapel. Reda came with Vivian to help her get comfortable in her new ward. The first Sunday, they were introduced in Sunday School class, and as they were walking home, they were offered a ride by two young men from their class. One was Gary Peterson and the other was their Sunday School Class President, Don Ostler. Vivian soon enjoyed a warm circle of friends, two of whom gave her name to the full-time missionaries. By this time, Vivian had been attending church for three years. She had felt God’s spirit, gained a testimony of Joseph Smith’s first vision of God the Father and his son, Jesus Christ. She was already converted, but the missionaries gave her the lessons to be certain she understood the principles of the gospel. Her dad gave permission, and Vivian was baptized and confirmed on December 6, 1952, when she was 17 years old. In retrospect she said, “I shall never forget the purity and goodness I felt when I came up out of the water.” As part of the service, they sang, “The Spirit of God Like a Fire is Burning,” and she felt like she wanted to shout as she sang that song. It remained her favorite hymn for the rest of her life. The following June, she was asked at the last minute to substitute for someone who was to speak on the Sacrament Meeting program. Her topic was “What the Church Means to Me as a Convert.” Don Ostler, who had enlisted in the U.S. Naval Reserve and was now on active duty, spoke on the same program. His topic was, “What the Church Means to Me as a Serviceman.” After the meeting he asked Vivian if he could write to her because he was being deployed overseas. Vivian agreed but vowed to herself she would not write first. They exchanged letters for his nine months of deployment, and Vivian was eager to see him when he returned home. As he hitchhiked home from Virginia to California, he took the opportunity to stop at church history sites and to visit his birth mother in Spokane, Washington. Instead of being at home when he arrived, Vivian had traveled with her church group to Mesa, Arizona to do temple work. Don and Vivian had both hoped to attend BYU. She had a full-tuition academic scholarship. He was also considering serving a mission. But before school started, they fell in love and their plans changed. Both Don and Vivian were determined to do what was right, they consulted their bishop, who told Don that marriage was a mission itself and advised him and Vivian to get married. Their marriage took place on October 30, 1954 in the Saint George Temple of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, attended by only the four friends who travelled with them from Los Angeles. No family members were able to attend. Vivian was four days shy of turning 19 years old. Thrilled to be married, Vivian gave up her BYU scholarship, and Don enrolled for his second year at Santa Monica City College. They gave their hearts to each other and to their shared commitment to God. For the next 66 years, Vivian devoted herself to family, home, and church. She welcomed six children, including Linda Marie, Creg Donald, Lora Lynn, Janet Earleen, Steven John, and Kathleen Elizabeth. Because she had so little memory of her childhood and lacked a motherly role model, she applied herself to learning how to be a good wife and mother. She worked at it constantly. The theme of her life, which she displayed prominently in her home, is taken from the scripture 3 John 1:4, “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.” She and Don believed in accepting church callings, and they counted on God to help them become adequate to do whatever He asked of them. She took her callings seriously, planned carefully, and served diligently whether teaching Relief Society, providing leadership in auxiliary presidencies, or serving in various music callings. The first time she was called to serve as Primary pianist, she could play only a few of songs and those with just one hand. She practiced and practiced and gradually improved. When she was called as ward organist, she and Don bought a used, full-sized church organ, so she could practice at home. She served for decades in a variety of music callings, including leading a ward choir that is still appreciated for being a wonderful spiritual experience. She was ward chorister until at age 83, her declining health prevented her service. This week, on December 3, 2020, at age 85 and one month, our beautiful, kind, generous, and loving wife, mother, grandmother, and friend slipped the bonds of mortality and returned to her Heavenly Father. We are as certain as we can be that our Father and her Savior embraced her … with words to the effect, “Well done, my good and faithful daughter. Welcome home.” A viewing will be held on Saturday, December 5th at Utah Valley Mortuary, 1966 West 700 North, Lindon, Utah, from 11:00 am to 12:00 pm. Funeral services will be available to view live at 1:00 pm at the following link: Vivian Ostler's Funeral Service. Interment will take place in the Orem City Cemetery. Funeral Directors: Utah Valley Mortuary.